Quotes

2.05: Nick & Nora/Sid & Nancy
Jess: [looking at bookshelf] Wow, aren't we hooked on phonics.
Rory: Oh, I read a lot. Do you read?
Jess: Not much.

Rory: So, that was quite a disappearing act you pulled the other night.
Jess: Potlucks and Tupperware parties aren't really my thing.
Rory: Too cool for school, huh?
Jess: Yes, that is me.
Rory: What are you doing?
Jess: Oh this? Nothing. [does an illusion with a coin] Just another little disappearing act.
Rory: Little tip?
Jess: Yeah?
Rory: If you ever want to speak to me again, don't pull that out of my ear.
Jess: So I assume the nose is off limits too?
Rory: Any place you wouldn't naturally find a coin, let's leave it that way.
Jess: So what are you doing now?
Rory: I have some homework to finish.
Jess: Okay, then I'll leave you this last little trick. [hands her a book]
Rory: You bought a copy? I told you I'd lend you mine.
Jess: It is yours.
Rory: You stole my book.
Jess: Nope, borrowed it.
Rory: Okay, that's not called a trick, that's called a felony.
Jess: I just wanted to put some notes in the margins for you.
Rory: What? [looks through the book] You've read this before.
Jess: About forty times.
Rory: I thought you said you didn't read much.
Jess: Well, what is much? Good night, Rory.
Rory: Good night, Dodger.
Jess: What?
Rory: Figure it out.
Jess: Oliver Twist.

2.08 The Ins and Outs of Inns
Jess: Should you be standing here all alone? I hear this is a pretty dangerous corner.
Rory: I'm fine.
Jess: Feeling succinct today?
Rory: Pretty much.
Jess: Hmm. Did I do something to offend?
Rory: Me?
Jess: Yeah.
Rory: No.
Jess: Good.
Rory: You might want to ask that same question to Luke though.
Jess: Meaning?
Rory: You've got this whole town down on him.
Jess: Really? How did I do that?
Rory: You know how you did that.
Jess: I'm not really familiar with the blue book laws in this town, so you can be talking about a lot of things. Dropping a gum wrapper, strolling arm in arm with a member of the opposite sex on a Sunday. [Rory gestures to the chalk outline] Ah. What about it?
Rory: You did it. The whole town knows you did it. They had a meeting about it.
Jess: You actually went to that bizarro town meeting? Those things are so 'To Kill a Mockingbird.'
Rory: Yes, I went. And Luke went. And when he got there, everyone ganged up on him. They all want you gone.
Jess: Wow, bummer.
Rory: And he's standing there yelling at everyone and defending you and paying Taylor back for his lettuce losses
Jess: Wait, his what?
Rory: And now Luke's a pariah and it's all because of you! What a shock, you don't care about any of this.
Jess: I didn't say that.
Rory: Go. I'm tired of talking to you.
Jess: Fine. [starts to walk away]
Rory: You care nothing about Luke and his feelings!
Jess: Got a second wind, huh? [walks back over to Rory]
Rory: All he does is stick up for you and all you do is make his life harder. I guess that's what you have to do when you're trying to be Holden Caulfield but I think it stinks. Luke has done a lot for my mom and a lot for me, and I don't like to see him attacked. Okay, second wind over.
Jess: I didn't know they were coming down so hard on him.
Rory: Funny, I never pegged you as clueless, my mistake.
Jess: Okay. I get it. No, no, I do, I get it. So did you at least think it was funny?
Rory: That is so not the point.
Jess: Ah, you thought it was funny.

2.05: Nick & Nora/Sid & Nancy
Jess: Want to bail?
Rory: Um...no.
Jess: How come?
Rory: Because it's Tuesday night in Stars Hollow. There's nowhere to bail to. The 24-hour mini mart just closed 20 minutes ago.
Jess: So we'll walk around or sit on a bench and stare at our shoes.
Rory: Look, Sookie just made a ton of really great food, and I'm starving and though it may not seem like it right at this moment, it's gonna be fun. Trust me.
Jess: I don't even know you.
Rory: Well, don't I look trustworthy?
Jess: Maybe.
Rory: Okay, good. Let's eat.